Monday, January 17, 2011

I'm Getting Closer To Letting Go... To Letting Go of You.

Once there was a little girl. She had long hair and wore a purple bathing suit. She followed her big brother around everywhere. Her big brother had a friend, and they never let the little girl play. They pulled on her long hair and made her get Kool-Aid and cookies.

But they never did play with her, even when they promised.

The years passed by, turning pages in a book, the faded chalk likes from hopscotch. The girl was not so little, and her hair was not so long. And no longer did she let anyone walk all over her.

Until she saw the boy, her big brother's friend. He looked across the art room table at her and was taken in by the color of her eyes and the swell of her hips, not to mention her quick tongue and the way love flowed from her, like blood from an open wound.

And they fell in love.

And he left her.

And the years passed by again, and again, like drying river beds, like broken headstones. He saw her in math class applying clear gloss to her lips. He followed her out of the room, watched her bend over to pull on the laces of her high black boots.

"I am so sorry for everything."

These words would be repeated more times that she cared to count over the next year. He took her to his home, laid her in his bed and made love to her, ripping her apart on the inside. She didn't complain, because sometimes love hurts.

He mentioned his own little girl, and the girl plied him with hair ties, advice, movies, anything and everything.

But his own daughter left.

And he left the girl.

But he came back, like a bad penny or a good luck charm. He was always at the back of her mind, like a pebble in her shoe.

So they crawled through time together. She coaxed him through dark depressions. Coaxed him through alcohol binges and screaming matches. She flinched as he raised his hand to her more than once.

But he left again, the allure of the white powder and the places it took him too strong. He left her again, and she vowed that this was the last time...

Too bad his own little girl died.

She won't come and comfort him now. Even his heart break can't convince her that she won't be pulled into his web again. And if she does, she won't come out alive.

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